In my quiet time I was taken back to a moment of “remembrance” I guess you could say. I reflected on times where I’ve tried gratitude journals or lists. Only to eventually come to terms with the fact that, “yea, no” they’re not for me. Granted they’ve had their moments and place for me but as a daily practice I didn’t see them as beneficial. I’d posture myself to write my lists in the morning, rising with the intention to show myself and the Lord gratitude, fully thankful for everything. Leave the room that morning refreshed and ready to take on the day only to be derailed by the same triggers. I’d find myself spiraling time and time again even though I believed in and practiced gratitude.
I’m thankful for W and grateful for X. I am honored to be able to Y and I’m so privileged that I have Z.
Backwards and forwards I meant what I was saying, yet the trigger still won. So I switched it up. I’ll practice gratitude in the morning AND at night. This way I’m covering my bases.
Nope.
As I went to begin my practice at night I was reminded of the spirals. How I was derailed, triggered.
So, I switched it up yet again. I’ll practice gratitude in the morning, throughout the day AND at night. Verbally I was becoming a very grateful person.
Only to realize my mid-day practices were filibustered by whatever trigger I was up against.
So, what was the issue, why wasn’t this working?
Gratitude in itself can be thought of as being trifold, an affective trait, mood or emotion. Gratitude is a science. The use or implication of gratitude lists can motivate self-improvement, restructure negative thoughts and increase self-esteem.
Science has shown that expressing gratitude can motivate self-improvement by introducing and putting those positive emotions forward. In this self-esteem is increased, ultimately shaping the person.
The restructuring of negative emotions comes into play by providing the alternative view of something the gratitude practitioner may have been struggling with. Reshaping the mind to positive truths and pushing them into the present blessing rather than wrestling with the negative.
If this is all true, then what gives? Why don’t they just “work”. What was I missing?
The missing puzzle piece in gratitude practice is this: the root of the feeling or issue that led you to start the written or verbal list/practice may not be addressed using a gratitude list. So the negative thoughts or cycle live to fight another day.
So the saying goes,
“you feel what you feel and what you feel is real”
Right. So then feel what you feel, ride the full wave of that emotion with the intention of uprooting and eradicating it. And gratitude will flood in.
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